Well hello there...

Welcome to my blog. Brb... I'm making memories (read as: Wine. I'm going to get some wine...)

An Ode to Mucus

An Ode to mucus: Oh mucus, oh mucus,

Thou runneth down my face like a rocket

No matter how many tissues in my pocket,

Or tampons I stick up to block it

Yet you continue to run forth

But South, not north

You maketh my lap look gooey.

That’s all I’ve got.

So I woke up with the flu yesterday, and last night did not sleep a wink.  And yet here I sit, at work, narfy as all feck.  I heard they give you a medal if you come in to work when you sick.

I could do with a nice medal.  So I can stick it up my left nostril to stem the flow.  Seriously where does it come from, I keep blowing and blowing and yet…. There’s still more!!!

So apparently when your nose runs it’s the bodies way of trying to keep the germs from going into your lungs. (See… this blog isn’t always filled with drivel!)

Can’t I just tell them to fuck off?

Surely I do not need this much of a runny nose?

I say NAY! Though shalt not passsss!

*Collapses on desk*

… tell my mother I loved her.



Road Trip

Road Trip