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Welcome to my blog. Brb... I'm making memories (read as: Wine. I'm going to get some wine...)

The Sound of Cheese...

So for some strange reason, I have developed some sort of stress-related insomnia. Don’t you love the way I self diagnosed myself there… and I made it sound quite official eh :) “stress related”… the specialist that I am… almost like those weirdy hypochondriacs who have “Diagnose Yourself over the internet” websites set as Favourites on their Internet Explorer! “Oh my word…. I appear to have a freckle on my elbow! Gods… that wasn’t there yesterday!!! What if it’s serious!! I better Google it!

Google Doc: Do you have a fever?

*palms on forehead*

Weirdy: Well… I am a bit warm (even though I was just drinking a hot cup of LAVA and it is 40 degrees outside) but yes God yes it MUST be a fever….!

Weirdy: Yes. Yes I do.

Google Doc: Do you have a freckle on your elbow?

*looks around suspiciously*

Weirdy: YES! (I TOLD you it was serious!)

Google Doc Diagnosis: Ebola. Please stay where you are the CDC will be there for your anal probe shortly!

Weirdy: *cough* Would you mind terribly reminding them to bring the lube with them this time. The last time I had The Black Death they didn’t even bother with the niceties!

Anyhoo wow I went so far off my topic there!

Back to my poxy insomniaaaaaaaaa! It usually entails me waking up at either 1am or 3am. My very first thought is usually: Ball sweattttt! And then I lie there for hours worrying about work related bollocks pfffft! But not last night, oh no no no, I was the master of my own thoughts last night!

I promptly declared “WORK I shall NOT think of you now, you are NOT the boss of meeeeeeee! …. Instead…. Tonight I shall lie awake for hours and think of…. Cheese?

Yes, yes… I too sometimes think I’m not all “there” upstairs.

Not just cheese though. I was thinking of Movies with “cheese” in them. I thought of a few at first… and then I couldn’t stop! So I thought I’d share some :) Cause I’m cool that way! And cheese is nyom nyom!


Cheeseo-tar: This one is about big knobs of stinky poep-like smelling cheese that attacks an alien planet with the idea of stealing all the resources only to discover that it is inhabited by peace-loving Melrose wedges. Real tear jerker this one.

SpidercheeseMan: Shoots mozzarella. Nuff said.

Raiders of the Lost Cheese

Harry Potter and the Philosophers Cheese

Lock Stock and Two Smoking Cheeses

The Devil wears Cheese

The Silence of the Cheese: I’ll eat your cheese with some *slurpy noise* crackers and a nice Chianti

The Godcheese

The Lord of the Cheese: Entails a scene where a big Cheesegrater shouts “Thou Shalt not Passssssssssssssssss!”

Cheese of Arabia

Saving Private Cheese: First scene involves a lot of grated cheese – Very traumatic

Good Cheese Hunting

Pulp Cheese: Freaky scene where a block of Gouda stabs an adrenaline shot right into the heart of a delicate wedge of Brie. Also contains a weird gay gimp scene involving two cheese curls… use your own discretion when watching this one.

Debbie Does Cheese: I think I’ll just leave this one alone…


What’s yellow and sits outside of your gate at night…?

Security cheeeeeeese!

It doesn't even make your bum sticky!!

You want to sell a WHAT on e-Bay?!!